Currently in a Desert

I’d be lying if I said that my depression has been manageable recently. In all honesty, I’ve been so overwhelmed by it. I’ve cried almost every day. I’ve started to isolate myself. I haven’t taken care of my basic needs such a washing my hair, putting on lotion, even showering sometimes.

This morning, I was listening to this song and I found myself repeating it over and over, all the way to work. Then I found myself crying. This is my current battle cry: 

“This is my prayer in the desert

When all that's within me feels dry

This is my prayer in my hunger and need.

My God is the God who provides”

I may not always feel like God is going to provide or that He’s my victory over my depression but He is. I don’t always praise Him in the midst of the storm because I’m so focused on the storm itself. But today, God reminded me that I still have a reason to sing and to worship. I may be in desperate need of a good hair wash and I may not have the strength or will to complete the simple tasks ahead of me today but God will give me the strength to worship and praise Him, knowing that this won’t last forever. 

“And this is my prayer in my battle

When triumph is still on its way

I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ

So firm on His promise I'll stand”

I may not always feel joyful and happy but I’m relearning how to trust God through the dark times. Join me.

I love you always but most importantly, God loves you always in all ways.